Lonely faith walking seems as bleak as when a prisoner sets off for his/her last walk of life. The prisoner spent most of his/her final years in solitary confinement and now as he/she begins that last walk down the hall of death, the other convicts mutter ‘dead man walking, dead man walking’.
The same feelings of solitude can be found in ones own faith journey. Lots of quiet time. Lots of questions being asked. Wondering where life is taking us. Will we ever know? Will we full fill Gods plan for us? All along the outsiders, those with no journey of their own, staring at our very existence. Whispering in a soft quiet voice ‘lonely faith walking, lonely faith walking’
The journey of faith can at times feel as if you are all alone. A prisoner in your own journey. There never seems to be another person who is at the same point as you are. And when your friends and family are not even on the journey, you suddenly find yourself walking down the hall of loneliness. Family and friends seem to scatter. Fear sets in and you begin to ask yourself what am I doing wrong? I am only searching for a better relationship with God.
Does it show on my face or in the way that I walk? Is it because my attitude about life has changed and yours still remains the same? Is it because I read in silence and then stare up into the sky as to take in all the beautiful creations God has made? Is it the burgundy, for others black, pressed with gold letters, book I carry around? Is it because I take time out of my busy day to kneel down to pray? Is it the way I still love you even though you hurt me badly? Is it the way I care for you when your feeling bad? Is it the card I sent to tell you that you are loved and thought about often? Is it the way I lift my hands when I praise his name in song? What am I doing wrong? Why have you left me?
I want to continue to walk with God. I want to continue to lean into God and grow my faith every single day. I no longer want you, me or anyone else to feel alone. If you feel you are ‘Lonely Faith Walking’ then I want you to contact me so that we can walk together.
Loneliness and the feeling of being unwanted is the most terrible poverty. – Mother Teresa